


A Little Boy's Fear

by wickedblack



Category: The Shadowhunter Chronicles - All Media Types
Genre: Alec and Magnus Are Really Good Parents, Bigotry & Prejudice, Consul Alec Lightwood, Cute, Cute Max Lightwood-Bane, Domestic Fluff, Domestic Magnus Bane/Alec Lightwood, Family Bonding, Fluff, High Warlock of Brooklyn Magnus Bane, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Married Magnus Bane/Alec Lightwood, Parent-Child Relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-03
Updated: 2020-05-05
Packaged: 2021-03-01 18:41:06
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 7,535
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23991700
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wickedblack/pseuds/wickedblack
Summary: Max heard some Shadowhunters talking about him and his parents while they were visiting Uncle Jace and Aunt Clary, and it's been bugging him ever since.
Relationships: Clary Fray/Jace Wayland, Magnus Bane/Alec Lightwood, Simon Lewis/Isabelle Lightwood
Comments: 16
Kudos: 303





	1. Am I Good, Daddy?

_Alec Lightwood-Bane_

Alec woke to the sound of tiny feet shuffling on the floor. He reached back absentmindedly, trying to feel for Magnus in the dark. The sheets were cold. In his half-asleep state, he had forgotten that his husband was out of town. He had called at bedtime to tell Alec that his magic was much too depleted for him to Portal back and to wish the boys good night, gently telling them to _be good and listen to Daddy while I'm gone or else I might forget about your little presents._ He had hung up soon after, but not before promising Alec that he would Portal back home as soon as he felt strong enough, maybe even during the night.

"Daddy?" He heard Max whisper.

He forced his eyes open, surprised to see Max standing by his side of the bed, looking up at him with wide eyes. Max didn't have nightmares, he was a happy little boy who never let anything bother him long enough to. have nightmares. Something both Alec and Magnus were extremely grateful for. Rafe, on the other hand, was another matter entirely. He was quite prone to nightmares but Alec figured that it was to be expected. He had gotten better since coming to live with them but Rafael would still find his way to their bed at least once a week. Not that Alec minded. The only time Max ended up sleeping with them was when he was feeling particularly clingy—but that decision was always made before bedtime—, or when one of Rafe's nightmares woke him up. Max was on his own tonight, no nightmares from Rafe.

"Mh?"

"Are you sleeping?"

Alec had to smile. "Not anymore, baby."

"Can I sleep with you, pretty please?"

Alec grinned. "Hop in."

"Yay!"

He ran around the bed and climbed on Magnus's side. Alec felt the sheets being pulled as his son hauled himself up and turned to face him with a small smile. He knew that Max being almost six meant that he would have to stop sleeping in their bed and start sleeping in his own bed every single night very soon but he loved these little moments way too much for them to stop, not yet. He figured that it could still wait a few years.

Max slipped under the covers with a happy sigh and let his head hit Magnus's pillow with a little thud. He laid there for a few seconds, spread out starfish-like, before he crawled over and came to rest against Alec's chest. He didn't resist the urge to hug his son close. Having Max so close to him made him miss Magnus even more somehow.

Alec looked at the time. It was a few minutes to midnight and he decided that he could indulge his son for a little while.

"Is Rafe still sleeping?" He asked softly, knowing that Max had to walk by his older brother's room to come here.

Max nodded. "I wanted to go sleep with him but he said _go away, Max, I'm sleeping,_ " Max said, imitating Rafe's voice and tone perfectly.

Alec winced, he would have to have a little conversation with his oldest son about that. "That wasn't very nice of him, was it?"

"S'okay. I know he gets grumpy when Papa's gone." Max shrugged carelessly. "It's even worse when you're gone though."

Alec looked down at Max in surprise. "Is it?"

Max nodded energetically. "He cries sometimes but Papa said we shouldn't tell you 'cause you'll feel bad."

Max had always been the worst at keeping secrets. When they first adopted him, Rafael had always been worried that Alec would never come back and ended up crying whenever he went away for a little why. He had thought Rafe's crying had stopped a while ago but it seemed that it hadn't. Magnus had simply stopped telling him and Max had obviously kept it a secret for Alec's sake for as long as his little heart could. He couldn't help the pang of guilt that tugged at his heart. He appreciated the sentiment but Magnus keeping it all a secret made him more upset than he cared to admit.

"How do _you_ feel when I'm gone?"

Max shrugged. "I don't mind. I know you'll always come back. I always tell Rafe you'll come back but I don't think he believes me very much."

Alec sighed. "Do you... Do you cry sometimes too?"

"Mh... Sometimes," Max admitted. "But that's only 'cause Rafe cries too much and it makes me sad," he added quickly.

"Oh, baby," Alec sighed and kissed Max's mop of hair, trying to ignore the guilt that was weighing his chest down.

He vowed to himself that he would find a way to leave less often.

"How about you tell me why you're not sleeping yet? It's quite late, Mister." Max merely shrugged. "Are your horns hurting again?" He ran his hand through Max's hair in a soothing manner, carefully avoiding said horns in case they did hurt.

Max shook his head. "Papa put some cream on them before he left."

Alec smiled. "Papa's taking real good care of you, huh?" He could feel Max's lips move into a smile against his chest as he nodded.

He kept running his fingers through Max's hair, knowing that it would lull his son to sleep in no time. Alec had to fight sleep himself. He had gotten up early in the morning just to see Magnus off, even though his husband had told him that he didn't have to. He was starting to regret it now that he had to stay awake for Max.

"Am I good, Daddy?"

Alec froze. "What?"

The question had been unexpected. Max had been quiet for a while and Alec had started to think that he had fallen asleep.

"Am I a good boy?"

Alec frowned. "Of course, you're the best little boy."

"Really?"

"You're the nicest little boy I know, baby."

"You're just saying that 'cause you're my daddy," Max sighed.

Alec had no idea where all this was coming from. "I'm not. I've met many little boys in my life, you know. Some of them were nice but you and Rafe are definitely the best. My sweet little boys."

"But Uncle Jace said demons are bad."

Alec felt like he couldn't breathe. He knew exactly where this was going and he didn't like it one bit. He and Magnus had done everything in their power to make Max feel loved and cared for, and to never talk about his demon blood, not until he was old enough to understand that it didn't change anything. He wasn't ready yet, Alec wasn't ready either, but it seemed that he. already knew. Alec knew that being raised surrounded by Shadowhunters might not be easy for Max, but he thought that he and Magnus had made a good enough job.

"What does that have to do with you, baby?"

"Me and Papa, we have demon blood?"

Alec felt his eyes sting with unshed tears but he refused to cry now, not in front of Max. "You do."

"So we're not good? I don't wanna be a demon, Daddy," Max whined, and Alec could feel his son's tears wet his shirt.

Alec sat up at once, pulling Max with him, and made him sit on his lap. He felt his heart break at the sight of his son's tear-stained blue cheeks.

"Max, look at me. You're not a demon, okay? You're a good little boy."

"But-"

"Do you think your papa is a bad person?"

Max's eyes widened as though the mere thought of thinking of Magnus as anything other than perfect horrified him. Alec had never seen him shake his head so hard before.

"Good. I don't either. No one does because your papa's really good and really kind. He makes a lot of people happy. You, and me, and Rafe." Max nodded his agreement. "How about Aunt Cat? Is she nice?"

Max nodded, the tears had stopped and Alec was really glad. "She always gives me lots of candies."

Alec wasn't sure that was a good thing but he decided not to tell Max for now. "What about Aunt Tessa? She's good, right?"

Max nodded once again as he sniffled and wiped his cheeks dry as best he could. "She gives good hugs."

Alec smiled. "Yeah. Those are nice, huh?"

Max grinned but kept rubbing at his eyes. They would be sore and puffy in the morning but Alec didn't have the heart to tell him to stop.

"You're warlocks, you know that, right? You and Papa and Aunt Cat and Aunt Tessa. Papa and I explained that to you, remember?"

Max nodded.

"They're really good and so are you. Being a Warlock doesn't change that."

"But I have a demon inside me, Daddy."

The tears were coming back full force and Alec felt like he was on the verge of a panic attack. "No, you don't. Listen to me. Yes, you have demon blood but just a tiny little bit. A single drop. That doesn't change anything and certainly not who you are."

Max looked down at his hands, frowning deeply. He seemed to think hard about what Alec had just said. Alec hoped it was a good thing and that he would understand and go back to being his happy little boy. When Max looked back up with a pout on his lips and fresh tears in his eyes, Alec honestly felt like he wouldn't be strong enough for this.

"But Papa has a little 'cause he has cat eyes. I have blue skin and horns. That means I have a lot, yes?"

"No, it doesn't. Your aunt Cat has blue skin, remember? I love your blue skin, Max. Your little horns are so beautiful."

"But they hurt sometimes."

"I know they do, baby. That's because they're growing and that's what the cream is for."

Max nodded. "It feels really good."

"Just because you have those cute little horns doesn't mean you're bad, okay? They make you special."

Max narrowed his eyes as though he was having a hard time believing Alec. "I am?"

"Sure you are. You're really special. You make me so happy all the time. Whenever I see your little face, I'm the happiest daddy on Earth."

"You make me happy too, Daddy." Max smiled. Alec loved that smile.

"I'm glad I do, baby."

"I'm glad I'm a good boy, Daddy."

"The best," Alec grinned.

Max threw himself against Alec's chest suddenly, hugging him tightly with his tiny little arms. Alec felt like crying all over again. He never wanted to let go and he never wanted his son to feel like he had a second ago ever again.

"M'sorry, Daddy," Max mumbled, his voice already laced with sleep, as they laid back down on the bed.

"What for?" Alec went back to running his hand through Max's hair, happy to see that he had settled down enough to consider sleep.

"M'sorry I believed all the things they said."

Alec wanted to ask what he meant. He wanted to know who _they_ were, but he knew that they had done enough talking for tonight. Max was exhausted and so was Alec. Seeing Max so distraught had drained him of all energy.

"It's okay, baby. As long as you don't believe anymore."

He felt Max nod weakly against his chest and sighed in relief. "Night, Daddy. I love you lots."

"I love you too."

Alec kissed Max's head a couple of times and purposefully ignored the lone tear that made its way down his cheek. He wished his son a night without nightmares, as they usually were, except tonight they might not be. The whole conversation filled Alec with dread. All those thoughts had obviously come from somewhere and he dreaded the day he found out where from exactly. He knew that many Shadowhunters were prejudiced still, no matter how hard he fought to put an end to it. He had naively thought that all prejudiced people had been left behind in Idris. How wrong he had been. The mere thought of one of them coming anywhere near Max filled him with rage. Whoever had dared fill his son's head with such awful thoughts would pay dearly. Consul or not, he would make them think twice before lying to his sons and making them feel so bad about themselves.

He lost track of time. Max had fallen asleep a while ago but sleep still evaded Alec, no matter how hard he tried. He eventually the soft sound of the front door opening. Magnus had kept his promise and Portaled home as soon as possible. It was quite close to dawn now but Alec felt glad nonetheless. He needed Magnus right now.

"Hey you," Alec whispered softly when Magnus appeared in the doorway. 

"Hey, gorgeous." Magnus grinned as he made his way to the bed. "I missed you."

Alec chuckled softly. "I missed you too."

Magnus swiftly climbed over Alec but soon froze, only now noticing Max laying across Alec's chest. He was sleeping soundly, all trace of their earlier conversation gone from his face. "What's he doing here?" Magnus asked, not unkindly.

Alec glanced down at his son for a second. "I-" The words got stuck in his throat and he found himself sobbing harder than ever, unable to stop.

"Hey, hey," Magnus whispered, trying to gain Alec's attention. He gently cupped Alec's face with his hands and forced him to look up and meet his eyes. "It's okay, look at me, I'm here. You need to calm down, Alexander, please."

Alec knew that Magnus was right. He needed to calm down or else he would wake Max up, but he couldn't. He tried to reason with himself but his body refused to comply.

"Okay, okay." Magnus grabbed Max with the utmost care and laid him down on his side of the bed. Alec prayed relentlessly for Max not to wake. They would have a hard time explaining to the little boy why his daddy was crying so hard. "Come on, come with me. You don't want to wake Max now, do you?"

Alec shook his head and grabbed hold of Magnus's hand, letting him pull him out of the bedroom. He let himself be pulled to the sofa and he let Magnus pull him into a tight hug. Alec was grateful to have his husband's shoulder to cry on. Only now did he realize that he had forbidden himself to cry, not until Magnus was home, and now that he was, he couldn't stop and it felt good.

"Sh, it's okay. I'm here for you, darling." Magnus reassured him softly.

He didn't know how much time he spent crying but Magnus never let him go. He whispered sweet nothings into his ear all the while, letting Alec cry for as long as he wanted, for as long as he needed to. The sun was rising by the time he felt calm enough to consider talking. His face was still wet with tears and dry sobs were still racking through his body but he felt much calmer than before.

"Are you feeling better, angel?" Magnus asked softly.

Alec nodded. "Yeah, I'm sorry I freaked out."

"It's okay, darling. But I admit I'd feel a lot better if you told me what happened exactly. You have no idea what my mind came up with while you were crying, Alexander."

"I'm so sorry, I..." He trailed off, his brain still unable to come up with the words.

"Is Max okay?" Alec nodded. "Rafe?" Another nod.

"Max said some awful things."

"Max?" Magnus frowned, confusion clear on his face.

"He said that he was demon, Magnus, that he was bad." Alec felt fresh tears roll down his cheeks but he was emotionally too exhausted to try and stop them.

"A demon?" He sounded like it physically pained him to even say the word.

"He said he had demon blood and that he had a demon inside of him, Magnus. He said that his skin and his horns were proof that he was a demon. He was sitting there and telling me all of those things. I tried so hard to make him feel better, to make him forget all the things that he had heard but it felt like I was falling apart. I didn't know what to do and you weren't here and-" His voice cracked and he didn't have the energy to talk any more.

"Oh, Alexander," Magnus mumbled as he pulled Alec into another hug.

"I want to be a good dad," Alec admitted in a small voice.

"You are. You're the best father I know, Alexander. Those two little boys are so lucky to have you. I'm sure you did a great job with Max, I'm just sorry I wasn't here for you. I can't even begin to imagine how hard that must have been for you."

"It was awful."

Magnus pulled away gently, forcing Alec to look him straight in the eye. The sight of Magnus's cat-like yellow-green eyes filled Alec with relief and happiness. They felt like home. "Oh, how I hate seeing so much pain in those gorgeous blue eyes of yours, darling."

Alec smiled a watery smile. "I'm sorry. I just- I think I might need a drink."

Magnus chuckled. "What you need is to sleep, darling, preferably for a whole day."

Alec smiled as he wiped his face dry using the hem of his shirt. "You might be right. Rafe's gonna wake up soon though."

Magnus leaned forward and pressed the most gentle of kisses on Alec's forehead. "Always the worrier. I'll take care of him, you go to sleep."

He felt like crying all over again, unable to bear the thought of being the one to keep Magnus from sleep. "But you didn't sleep either."

"I'm fine, Alexander."

"No, you're not." He whined and he was crying again before he even realized it.

"Oh, that's _a lot_ of tears. You're going to go to bed now and cuddle with Max, you need it. You let me worry about Rafe, okay?" Alec nodded as he got up from the sofa. "Want me to tuck you in, darling?"

"That's not funny!"

"Come here," Magnus said before pulling him into the sweetest kiss. It was wet but gentle. "You sleep tight, okay?"

Alec hummed his agreement against his husband's lips. "I love you."

"I love you too. Now, off you go."

Alec complied. "Dad?" He heard Rafe call for him just as he reached the door to their bedroom.

"No, no, you close that door," Magnus ordered him. "I'll go see Rafe. Good night, Alexander."

Alec hesitated for a second but he knew that he would never hear the end of it if he didn't listen to his husband. He closed the door gently and turned to face the bed, where Max was laying sprawled out, drooling on Magnus's pillow. He seemed peaceful and unbothered. That was the state Alec wanted him to be in all the time.


	2. Are We Bad Guys, Papa?

_Magnus Lightwood-Bane_

Magnus was a happy man. Happy man, fulfilled Warlock, cherished husband, loved parent. Magnus had been happy before, but never to this extent, he was sure of it. Alexander _Lightwood-Bane_ made him more than happy, he made him feel accomplished; like he was finally experiencing everything good that life had to offer. Alec, Rafe, and Max meant everything to him and he was so grateful for them that it hurt. He was so grateful to his husband for bringing all of this in his life, for making it all possible.

Seeing them all here in his loft, in _their home_ , surrounding him made his heart feel full to bursting. Rafe was lying next to him on the couch, his head resting in his lap, as he read yet another book in Spanish. Max was sprawled out on the carpet at Magnus's feet, relentlessly alternating between stroking Chairman Meow's fur and gently nuzzling him. He meowed at the cat from time to time, and Chairman replied with a meow of his own every single time. They were having their very own private conversation. It was endearing.

Rafe suddenly looked up from his book, smiling brightly at something standing behind Magnus. Alexander. That was his Alec smile and it was brighter than the sun. The love that Rafael had for Alec was special and it made Magnus's heart ache, but in a good way. Alec was Rafe's savior.

Alec's arms wound themselves around Magnus's neck. He couldn't resist the urge to smile as his husband kissed his cheek lovingly. No matter how many years he spent kissing Alec, his heart still and would always skip a beat.

"Me too, me too!" Max exclaimed as he jumped up onto the couch, much too close to Rafe's head to Magnus's liking. "I want a kiss too, Daddy."

Max extended his neck with a wide smile and Alec obliged, kissing him soundly on the cheek. He giggled, his eyes shining with delight. Even the smallest attention always filled Max with joy, it was a sight to behold. It nearly made Magnus forget about the little conversation he and Alec had had a week ago. His heart still ached at the mere thought of Alec's tears. Max hadn't mentioned anything of the sort since then and the amount of relief Magnus and Alec felt was unspeakable.

Alec hadn’t dared to leave since that day. As Consul, he had many duties. People wanted answers, Shadowhunters and Downworlders alike. Alec was a born leader, the best Consul Magnus had seen in a while, if not ever. He loved being Consul, he fought for what he believed in and never missed a chance to make a difference. For Magnus. For Max. For Rafael. Magnus had been surprised when Alec had told him that he was taking some time off to be with his family. He had promised Magnus that it wouldn’t be for long but he had refused to tell him for how long exactly. He suspected Alec didn’t even know himself. He would let the Inquisitor lead, attend meetings, and trust her to make wise decisions for as long as was needed. For as long as Alec and Max needed.

Alec bent down even lower and placed another sweet kiss on Rafe's cheek. Magnus didn't miss the way his oldest son blushed. "Didn't think I'd forgotten about you, did you?"

Rafe's cheeks reddened even further, Magnus feared he might implode. His eyes were shining so bright and were fixed on his dad, as though Alec was the only one in the room that he could see, and the only one that mattered.

"Okay." Alec grinned. "What do you guys want for dinner?"

"Pasghetti!" Max suggested, clapping his hands enthusiastically. Magnus had to bite his lip to stop himself from cooing at his son.

"Rafe?" Alec asked, he always made sure to include their oldest in any decision-making. Rafael still tended to be shy and let others, namely Max, decide everything for him. 

"Spaghetti's good," Rafe agreed with that tiny secret smile of his.

"Great, spaghetti it is." Alec smiled. "Oh, Jace and Clary are coming over for dinner," Alec added, looking straight at him before disappearing into the kitchen.

It seemed that it wasn't up for discussion. He looked down at Rafe. "Again?"

Rafe giggled at Magnus's pained expression, though Magnus himself failed to see how his pain could be so funny. He loved Jace and Clary dearly, they were family, but they had come over for dinner six times in the last two weeks already. Magnus could only take so much of Jace's whining. He would rather have Izzy and Simon over for dinner at the moment.

"You don't like Uncle Jace and Aunt Clary, Papa?" Max asked with a small frown on his face.

Magnus chuckled. "Of course I like them. I love them very much."

Max's eyes brightened. "Like you love Daddy?"

Rafe snorted. "Not like he loves Daddy, silly."

Magnus's breath hitched. He had heard Rafe call Alec _Daddy_ very few times since he came into their lives and it had stopped altogether almost a year ago, Rafe having deemed himself too old to use it. He only ever called Alec _Dad_ now and Magnus knew how much his husband missed Rafe calling him daddy, though he would never admit it out loud.

Max pouted down at his older brother. "I'm just asking."

"Well-"

"Rafael, your brother is not silly," Magnus interrupted quickly, putting an end to the fight before he could even begin. He knew that it would end in tears again otherwise. "No, I don't love them like I love your daddy, or both of you, but I love them very much."

Magnus's answer didn't seem good enough though. "Do you love me and Rafe more?"

"Of course, there's no one in the entire world that I love more than the two of you."

He could see Rafael's cheeks flush from the corner of his eye. Max gasped dramatically. "Not even Daddy?"

"Not even Daddy," he admitted. "But you can't tell anyone, okay? That's a secret."

"Is Daddy gonna be sad if I tell him?"

Magnus smiled Indulgently, his son's concern was heartwarming. "Of course not. You want to know a secret?" Max nodded eagerly and Magnus leaned closer to Max's ear. "Daddy loves you more than he loves me too," he whispered.

Max grinned, clearly overjoyed at the idea of being loved so much. Rafe, on the other hand, was frowning so hard that Magnus was scared that he might hurt himself. He closed his book with more force than necessary and got up without another word. He walked decidedly to the kitchen, clearly intent on talking to Alec.

"I said something wrong, Papa?" Max asked, he was pouting and it tore at Magnus's heart that he would even consider blaming himself.

"Daddy?" He heard Rafael call meekly for Alec's attention. "Do you love us more than Papa?"

Magnus decided not to listen any longer. That was a conversation they had to have on their own. He turned back to Max instead. "That was not your fault, Blueberry."

"Is Rafe okay, Papa?"

Magnus smiled softly and pulled Max to sit on his lap. "Yeah, he just needs to talk to Daddy for a second. He's fine."

"I wanna talk to Daddy too," Max whined.

"Well, Rafe and Daddy need a little time on their own right now."

"Why?"

"You know sometimes your brother has bad dreams, right?"

"Like when he thinks we don't love him anymore and he's sad?" Max was a smart little boy.

"Yeah, like that."

"He needs lots of cuddles when he's sad. Daddy said."

"That's what he needs right now."

"Oh, okay. He can have cuddles now, I'll have cuddles tonight." Max beamed, quite proud of himself. "I love you more than Uncle Jace and Aunt Clary, Papa," he added as an afterthought.

Magnus chuckled and kissed Max's forehead. "I'm really glad you do, Blueberry."

Max went back to playing with Chairman Meow soon after. The cat seemed perfectly content with letting Max playfully tug on his tail. Magnus could have bet all of his money on the fact that Chairman Meow would have rolled his eyes good-naturedly at Max if he had been able to. He considered joining Alec and Rafe in the kitchen until there were seven consecutive knocks at the door. Jace.

"Is Izzy here yet?" Jace asked in lieu of greetings when Magnus opened the door.

Magnus's eyebrows to his hairline. "Is she supposed to be?" He asked but his voice was drowned by Max's cry of "Uncle Jace!"

Max came running from the living room and crashed into Jace's legs, hugging them with all his might. Jace picked him up swiftly, walking past Magnus and into the living room without a second glance at him. All thought of Isabelle seemed to have fled from his mind at the sight of Max. The only thing he seemed to be interested in now was how Max's day had gone.

"Sorry, he kind of had a bad day," Clary apologized. Magnus had to admit that he had barely noticed her standing at Jace's side.

"Does he even have good days?" Magnus replied lightly, which earned him a smirk from Clary.

When Magnus returned to the living room with Clary in toe, he surprised to see Rafe had returned from the kitchen, much happier than when he had left to talk to Alec. It seemed he had gotten all the reassurance that he had needed. He greeted Clary warmly when they entered, but Magnus noticed how he shot mournful glances at his abandoned book from time to time. Max was talking animatedly to Jace, who had settled on the couch with his nephew in his lap.

"...and Papa said he's gonna buy me a turtle!"

That made Magnus freeze. "Did I?" He had never said that.

Max looked up at him with a sheepish smile. "Maybe it was Daddy."

"I never said that!" Alec yelled from the kitchen.

Magnus forced himself not to smile and instead narrowed his eyes at his son's mischievousness. "Daddy and I are going to talk about that."

Max took that as a victory because he cheered. Jace thought it was a good idea to egg him on and highfived him. Only now did it occur to Magnus that the idea might have come from Jace in the first place. He had a way of bringing out the most mischievous side of Max that weirdly made Magnus want to kick him in the shin.

“May I interest you in something to drink, my dear?” He asked Clary once he had gotten over his urge to kick Jace.

“I’ll just have some water, thanks,” Clary said.

Magnus wished he could say that he was surprised but she had never been much of a drinker.

“Jace? We have some orange juice, apple juice and I think I might have some cranberry juice around here somewhere.”

“Plinepapple juice, Papa!” Max reminded him helpfully.

Magnus grinned. “Right, my bad. We also have the finest pineapple juice there is.”

“I’ll just have whatever you’re having… I guess,” he added as an afterthought, as though he regretted the words as soon as they came out of his mouth.

“Boys?”

Both Max and Rafe stared at him with wide eyes. “Daddy said we can’t have juice right before dinner,” Rafe said, and Max nodded his agreement.

“Well, _I_ say today you can. Just don’t tell Daddy, okay? He’ll have my head.” Magnus winced inwardly at the mere thought of Alec’s wrath.

“I’m afraid it might be a little too late for that.” Alec’s voice came out of nowhere, making Magnus jump out of his skin.

“I hate Shadowhunters,” he muttered under his breath, clutching at his racing heart.

He was leaning against the doorframe, arms crossed over his chest, looking at Magnus with an eyebrow raised, clearly unimpressed. Magnus knew his husband well enough to know that he was hiding the urge to smile behind those pursed lips. He had thrown a dishcloth over his shoulder and it made him look so domestic—exactly like the husband and father that he was—that Magnus felt the sudden and overpowering urge to push him up against the wall and kiss the living daylights out of him.

“Pretty please, Daddy,” Max begged sweetly.

“Please, Daddy, just this once,” Rafe said.

The Daddy thing was here to stay, it seemed. Rafe didn’t seem to have noticed his slip up but everyone else had, especially Alec. Magnus knew that his husband was done for the moment Rafe had said _Daddy_. There was no way he could say no to that.

“Alright,” Alec eventually gave in, “but just the one.”

Isabelle and Simon arrived just in time for dinner. Despite his earlier reluctance, Magnus was glad to have them all over for dinner. He knew that having Jace and Izzy near filled Alec with joy and Magnus would do anything to make his husband happy, even if it meant dining with Jace every single day. Magnus hadn’t seen Alec laugh so hard in a week and he was grateful to Jace and Izzy for that.

It was supposed to be a good evening. The only thing Izzy and Simon seemed able to talk about was the wedding. Magnus kept stealing glances at his husband all the while and Alec returned each of them, a fond smile on his lips. It reminded him of the day they had gotten married, one of the best day of his life. He felt so lucky to be able to share his life with Alexander Lightwood-Bane. He suspected that he might have truly been blessed by the Angel.

It all went downhill when Izzy, Jace and Alec decided to take a trip down memory lane. Jace had had a bit too much to drink and words were spilling out of his mouth faster than ever. Rafe was drinking up each of Jace’s words, sitting at the edge of his seat and looking up at his uncle with starry eyes. Max seemed a little less interested, busy tracing some of Alec’s runes with his fingers. He liked to do that when he was feeling particularly tired but refused to go to bed. It soothed him and Magnus couldn’t blame him. He liked tracing Alec’s runes with his fingers before going to sleep as well.He was sitting in Alec’s lap, dinner long finished and forgotten, and was tracing the large fading Deflect Rune on his neck. Magnus wasn’t fooled, however. He knew that Max was listening.

“Remember that time we had to drag Jace through half of Brooklyn because he had eaten some Faerie fruit and thought he had fallen in love with a piskie?”

Alec laughed. “Best night of my life.”

Jace didn’t laugh. “Was not funny then, still not funny now.”

“Oh, come on,” Izzy laughed.

Isabelle threw herself into a retelling of that night, leaving the crudest parts out for Rafe and Max’s sake. They were all laughing by the time she was done, even Rafe, although Magnus was pretty sure he had no idea what a piskie was.

“Remember that Warlock,” Jace said out of the blue.

Magnus remembered, he had been there that night. That wasn’t a story he wanted Max to hear. Alec tried to stop his parabatai from saying any more with a soft “Jace.”

“He was a nasty one, real ass-”

“Jace,” Alec cut him off sharply.

“What? He did try to sell several of our body parts at the Market-”

“We really don’t need to hear that right now,” Magnus cut him off quickly, but not quick enough.

He wondered what would Alec say if he were to punch Jace right now. He looked Max, hoping that his son had somehow fallen asleep or had at least stopped listening to their conversation. He hadn’t. He had stopped playing with Alec’s runes and was looking down at his hands, a pout on his lips. Everyone else had fallen silent. It took a second for Jace to realize that something was wrong but once he did, he looked horrified.

“I’m tired, Daddy,” Max said, looking up at Alec with pleading eyes.

Magnus was out of his chair in no time. “It’s okay, I’ll take Max. You deal with _him_.” He hadn’t meant for it to sound so harsh but it had. “Come on, Blueberry.”

He picked Max up and carried him to his bedroom without another word. He was clinging to his neck hard and it made Magnus’s heart ache.

“Oh, Alec. I’m so sorry. You know I didn’t mean-” He heard Jace apologize. His voice was hoarse and full of regret. Magnus almost regretted the fact that he had considered punching him.

“It’s okay. It’s just been hard lately.” Alec was quick to reassure him.

Magnus kicked the door shut and put Max down on the bed. He went to the closet to find some PJ’s for his son. All week he had wondered whether Alec had talked to Jace about Max’s little breakdown. He had been so sure that his husband had confided in Jace. It seemed logical. He needed someone to talk to, someone who was not Magnus. He had always had that someone in Jace. He had every right to talk to his parabatai about what had had happened with Max. But he hadn’t.

He heard Max sniffle. “Are we bad guys, Papa?”

Magnus’s heart broke. “What? No.”

“But Uncle Jace said.”

Magnus was suddenly glad that he had been the one to take Max to bed. Alec wouldn’t have been able to take another one of these. Last time had been hard enough on him. He hadn’t even gotten over it yet.

“Your uncle didn’t know what he was saying,” Magnus said as he sat down next to his son.

“Yes, he did. He said the warlock was an ass.”

Magnus was pretty sure that _ass_ was not the word Jace had been going for. “We don’t say that word in this family, you know that.”

Max ignored him royally. “And he said he tried to sell Daddy.”

There was no denying that. Max had been paying more attention than even Magnus had thought. “Well, yes. He was a bad Warlock.”

“But if Warlocks are bad, that means we’re like demons?”

Magnus knew where those thoughts would lead them. He had thought the exact same thing when he had been younger, and that had not been so long ago. “Sometimes Warlocks are bad, Blueberry. Some of them do really bad things. That doesn’t mean every Warlock is bad and that doesn’t mean Warlocks are like demons.”

The tears had stopped but he was pouting so hard that Magnus feared his lower lip might fall off. “Am I a bad Warlock, Papa?”

“You’re the best Warlock I know. When you grow up, you’re going to be the best, the most powerful and the kindest Warlock ever. You’ll take care of many people and everybody is going to love you.’

“You don’t know that.”

“Of course I do, I’m your papa and you’re my little blueberry. A papa knows those things. I know that you’re the best little boy. Wanna know how I know that?” Max nodded. “The Angels told me.”

Max gasped. “The Angels?”

“Mhm.” Magnus nodded with a smile. “When you were born, the Angels came to see me and Daddy. They said we had to take really good care of you and make you really happy because you were the best boy they had ever seen. Wanna know what Daddy said?”

“Yes!” Max was excited now, clearly invested in the story. Magnus was glad.

“He said you were going to be the happiest little boy because he and I love you so much, more than anything in the world. He promised the Angels to give you all the love you deserve. He promised to give you everything you could ever wish for.”

Max beamed. “Does that mean I can have a turtle now?”

Magnus laughed. “Yes, you can.”

Max cheered happily but he sobered up too quickly to Magnus’s liking. “But they said we can’t trust Daddy ‘cause he’s bad too.”

Magnus frowned. “Who said that?”

“The mean Shadowfinders.”

Magnus took a deep breath, trying his best to remain calm. He had thought they had been done with prejudiced Shadowhunters. “They were lying, Blueberry.”

“But you can’t lie, it’s bad. You said, Papa.”

“You know that bad Warlock Uncle Jace was talking about?” Max nodded. “Sometimes there are bad Shadowhunters. They’re really mean and they would say anything to hurt a good little boy like you.”

Max pouted. “But I’m good, I don’t do anything. I always help you and Daddy clean and I help Rafe do the runes and I give food to the kitties!”

“I know, Blueberry, but they don’t care about that. They only want to hurt people. That’s why you shouldn’t listen to them, okay? You know that you can trust Daddy, don’t you?”

Max nodded.

“Good, because he loves you very much, my little blueberry.”

Max grinned. “I love him too, and you too, Papa.”

“I love you too, baby.” Magnus pulled him into a much-needed hug. “Still want to go to bed?”

It was way past bedtime for him and Rafe but Magnus figured tonight was a special case. However, Max nodded with a yawn. At least the sleepiness hadn’t been faked to hide his sadness. Magnus changed him quickly and put him to bed. Max’s eyes were already drooping.

“Kiss?”

Magnus smiled down at his son and bent down to give him his daily goodnight kiss on the forehead. “Want me to call Daddy?”

Max nodded once again. Magnus turned the lights off and was about to step out of the bedroom when he heard Max call for him.

“Is Daddy an angel, Papa?”

Magnus smiled. “I think he might be, indeed.”

“Wow,” Max sighed happily. “What about you, Papa?”

“I’m really lucky.”

When he got back to the living room, Isabelle and Simon had already gone. Clary was nowhere to be seen but Jace was still here, sitting on the couch with Alec. No one was talking but the tension from earlier was long gone.

“Is he okay?” Alec asked when he caught sight of him.

“Yeah. He wants a goodnight kiss from his daddy.”

Alec smiled. “I’ll be right back,” he told Jace.

Alec pecked him on the cheek as he walked by and Magnus felt his heart burst with happiness. He had needed that.

“Magnus, I’m sorry. I didn’t know, I swear. I would have never… That was so stupid of me,” Jace apologized as soon as Alec was out of earshot.

“I wanted to punch you, you know,” Magnus sighed.

“ You could have. I wouldn’t have blamed you.”

“You didn’t know. What kind of man would I be if I blamed you?”

“A good father?” Jace smirked.

“Not really,” Magnus mumbled under his breath.

Jace sighed. “Alec told me what happened.”

He went to pour himself a drink, he needed it. “We knew it would happen someday, though I have to admit that I foolishly thought we’d be able to protect him longer than that.”

“You did a great job. You’re a good father, Magnus.”

Magnus sighed. “Yeah, I try to be. Harder than I thought.”

“Isn’t it always?”

Magnus didn’t know what to say to that. He wanted to protect Rafe and Max from the world. It was definitely harder than he’d thought. Definitely harder to protect Max than Rafe. Sometimes he selfishly wished Max had been born a Shadowhunter, just so that he would never experience what it truly meant to live as a Downworlder in a society led by Shadowhunters. He always hated himself afterward.

“Hey,” Alec whispered in his ear as he wound his arms around his waist, hugging him tightly from behind. “Is Jace gone?”

Magnus hadn’t even noticed. “I guess. Is Max asleep?”

“Yeah, and Clary put Rafe to bed before she left. We’re all good.”

Magnus wanted to ask why they hadn’t left together but he figured that was a discussion for another time. He turned around to face his husband. “It was Shadowhunters.”

Alec frowned. “What?”

“You told me Max wouldn’t tell you who it was that said those things to him last week. Well, Max told me it was _Shadowfinders_.”

Alec groaned. “We really shouldn’t let that one slide.”

“Oh, I think it’s cute. Suits you better.” Magnus grinned cheekily.

Alec rolled his eyes. “Did he say who exactly?”

Magnus shook his head. “I didn’t push.”

“Probably just some Shadowhunters he heard talking at the Institute. We’ll find them.”

“They were talking about us, Alexander. Max told me that they said that you couldn’t be trusted. You, specifically.”

Alec sighed. “Again?”

They had had to deal with similar thoughts and speeches in the past. Many Shadowhunters had deemed Alec untrustworthy because he dared associate himself with _filthy Downworlders_ , because he was _married_ to one. Alec had never cared. He had always told Magnus that his love for him was stronger than that. However, it truly upset him this time because Max was involved.

“Max shouldn’t have to hear those things.”

Magnus frowned. “ _You_ shouldn’t have to hear those things.”

Alec shrugged. “I’m used to it, he’s not. He’s just a little boy.”

“And we’ll protect him.”

Alec nodded once and stole a sip of Magnus’s drink. “So I’m an angel now?”He asked, intent on changing the subject.

Magnus chuckled. “Max said it, I only confirmed what I thought to be the truth.”

“Way to put pressure on my shoulders, Mr. Bane.”

“Just be yourself, darling. Shouldn’t be hard to convince Max you’re truly one. And it’s Lightwood-Bane, by the way,” Magnus reminded him with a grin.

“Yes, it is. Isn’t that great?”

“Couldn’t wish for more. Now, how about you take me to bed, Mr. Lightwood-Bane? I could use a cuddle.”

Alec kissed him deeply. “It would be my pleasure.”


End file.
